Delivering my debut feature to Amsterdam – and the world – on November 20th I am fully aware of the complexity this film touches upon, and creates, when crafting the intimate portrait of a shy guy and his story he tells only me. The complexity certainly comes from its superstructure and very title, where I portray the struggle with class & self-formation, and take it further to racism, to what one would usually expect from a black & white debate in Europe these days. Taking Kacper Pobłocki’s original essay further this film does not exactly engage with his historical reconstruction of global slavery – or the whitening moment of 1945 – but focuses on the difference 1989 makes, which is Jacek Pawłowski’s date of birth. The underlying question is: How white is Jacek, and what is this worth? How is the Polish struggle for political equality corrupted by economic inequality? Why do the children of the shock therapy not rebel but struggle? Where is the therapy after the shock?

Delivering my debut feature to Amsterdam – and the world – on November 20th I am fully aware of the complexity this film touches upon, and creates, when crafting the intimate portrait of a shy guy and his story he tells only me. The complexity certainly comes from its superstructure and very title, where I portray the struggle with class & self-formation, and take it further to racism, to what one would usually expect from a black & white debate in Europe these days. Taking Kacper Pobłocki’s original essay further this film does not exactly engage with his historical reconstruction of global slavery – or the whitening moment of 1945 – but focuses on the difference 1989 makes, which is Jacek Pawłowski’s date of birth. The underlying question is: How white is Jacek, and what is this worth? How is the Polish struggle for political equality corrupted by economic inequality? Why do the children of the shock therapy not rebel but struggle? Where is the therapy after the shock?

Exploring the limits of self-realization – or where to belong – I decenter Jacek’s classist story with the struggle of Nidal Kalboneh and Roma Kwiatkiewicz, when touching upon the making of social order and racialized patterns of political and geographical whitening in Europe. In this picture, Nidal is the visible other in Polish society, while Roma could be the invisible one but she is not. In light of her dark eyes – and not exactly bright temper – she does not meet mainstream patterns of society, neither does she want to. Just like Ukrainian biographies Roma finds herself as the other in Poland, even if she is not. Struggling with
adamant clichés and popular stereotypes Roma is a fragile, yet strong woman, who speaks up against subtle – and not so subtle – discrimination. As young liberal Muslim Nidal, by contrast, can hardly escape his role of the visible other. Having moved from the Westbank to Poland, Nidal is a member of the small Muslim community in Poznan, who manages a restaurant, while his passion is music. Struggling for recognition and a meaningful life he is occasionally called Aladin on the streets and also experienced violence before. In love with the city Nidal nevertheless takes on the struggle and refuses to give up his smile.

The grand narrative that I craft thus subtly prepares the ground for understanding Polish clashes for gender equality and personal autonomy, while Poles become Rebels again. International audiences would usually expect the dominant constellation of Polish nationalists and/ or religious fundamentalists, who receive nothing but a mention from us. Instead we take up intersectional thought when portraying intimate struggles with an ambitious life, endless work and crucial migration. Here, Dutch liberalism does not serve as ideal, white role model but rather contradictory one. Drifting East and West, my idea thus traces the pitfalls of political & geographical whitening, while asking the audience for patience, and twisting popular patterns of cinematic expectations. My dramaturgy is fully committed to the unspectacular dimension of everyday
struggle, degrees of melancholy and hope in urban movements for emancipatory social change.

This said, Jacek Pawłowski is the unparalleled protagonist of this film. Ever since we first met in Groningen in 2013 Jacek has deeply impacted my thinking for the historical dimension of social struggles and the loops of everyday life. Jacek is a multitalented Master student of history, outstanding skater and young father, who gives voice to the struggle of his generation in Europe. Following along the footsteps of his personal heroKacper Pobłocki the beauty, as I see it, is Jacek’s intellect and charm to tell this complex story, as 28-year old skater, one of the best in Poland, who is capable of engaging his generation with the making of politics at the grassroots. One problem I do see, is, that I fell in love with Jacek, so I lack the professional distance needed at points. But I would hope that his charm is sufficient for others. In the end, I don’t claim an objective perspective anyway. This is my film on melancholy and never ending struggles in history, where social and spatial movements impact the intensity of local conflict decisively. This is my love letter to Poznan and urban Poland, and yes to Jacek, too.